There Are More of Us

Large Group of Diverse Multiethnic Students

There will always be more of us.

“The world is full of bullies, selfish assholes and criminals. What makes you think that you can make any difference when the whole world is against your message of positivity?”

Whoa.

That question was asked to me after a recent speaking engagement, and I’m sure that there might be someone reading this blog post who might feel the same way as she did.

If so, here was my answer to her:

“Sure, there are definitely a lot of jerks in this world, but there are way more people who are genuinely kind, generous and loving. That’s a fact.”

She shook her head and called me naive (which I’ve gotten used to pretty quickly, considering that I run a blog called “The Positivity Solution.”)

Nothing will change my mind on this simple truth.

There are more of us.

It’s Time to Wake-Up

If you’ve been hypnotized by the information that’s relentlessly attacking our brains on the 24-hour news channels, social media, and practically everywhere else, I could understand why you would think that the world is a very negative place.

I live in Los Angeles, and it’s not an uncommon occurrence that the news will lead with murders, rapes, and robberies. Hell, I just read a few hours ago that one of the former Power Rangers allegedly killed his roommate with a samurai sword, for crying out loud.

The more horrific the news is, the more we will hear of it. The more tragic the news is, the more that we’ll talk about it.

I’m not going to sit here and say that we should stick our head in the sand and pretend that bad news doesn’t exist. I’m just saying that we don’t need to marinate in it for 24 hours a day.

More importantly, we need to wake-up to the fact that good news happens too and it happens everywhere.

I’ll take it one step further.

Good news happens much more often than bad news does. In fact, it’s not even close. But when was the last time that you saw an incredibly positive news story shown on the news nonstop on every major network and news channel for a week straight?

You haven’t. Neither have I. But I’m sure that you could come up with a list of negative stories that have run nonstop on the news, right?

Because of this, the biggest lie of all has been given power and attention that it doesn’t deserve. The lie is that the world is a dangerous and evil place, and no one can be trusted. 

This isn’t close to being true.

Don’t let what you see consistently on the news, social media, or anywhere else put you into a trance of negativity and despair. The world is a positive place.

The key is being awake enough to see it.

Restoring Our Faith in Humanity

Here’s what I believe.

We all live in a world of good, loving, and friendly people.

Here’s a perfect example of what I’m talking about.

Over the holidays, I took my youngest daughter (she’s 3) out to the mall for a daddy-daughter shopping trip. And as always, she asked to ride the little kiddie train inside of the mall.

There was a little boy who was behind us in line, and his mom didn’t have any cash on her to buy him a ticket (she didn’t realize that it was “cash only” to ride the train until the train attendant told her.) Of course, it was a no-brainer for me to give her the $2 that was needed for her son to ride the train, and as a result the boy was deliriously happy.

Believe it or not, that wasn’t the special part. That was coming next.

As the kids were riding the train, the mom of the little boy went to the nearby ATM and withdrew enough money (about $20) to pay for all of the kids on the train to have another ride. Score! All of the kids cheered wildly and the parents (including me) were super appreciative.

It was about to get even better.

Once that ride was over and a new group of kids were about to go on the train, another parent who watched the previous act of generosity, offered to pay for a free ride for this new group of kids. It was the coolest thing that I have seen in a long time–complete strangers cheering, sharing kindness, and being generous just because it made people happy.

For anyone out there who doesn’t believe that positivity can be contagious, I’m here to tell you that it is. In less than 30 minutes at a kiddie train in the mall, I saw it happen. There are numerous other times in my life where I’ve seen a “positivity outbreak” (I just made that term up and I’m rolling with it.) Many of those stories I’ve shared here on this blog.

Stories like this would never make the news, but they happen all of the time. Literally everywhere.

I’m thinking that it’s time to shift our focus.

Yes, There Are More of Us

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: there are more kind, loving and positive people than there are negative people.

Don’t believe me?

You are one of those people, aren’t you? You personally know of more good people than bad people, right? If so, then you (and every other good, loving, and friendly person who you know) have a responsibility to do something very important.

You have a responsibility to restore the balance by shifting your focus.

There may be workplace bullies in this world, but there are more people who are committed to making work an enjoyable experience.

There may be criminals in this world, but there are more people who are dedicated law-abiding citizens making the world a better place.

There may be shady, no-good liars in this world, but there are more people who are trustworthy and honest.

There may be selfish people in this world, but there are more people who would be willing to give you the shirts off their backs at a moment’s notice.

There may be rude people in this world, but there are more people who will treat you with kindness, respect and love.

Am I deluded for thinking this way? Some people may think so.

All I know is that there are more people out there who are committed to making this world a more positive place. We might not be as loud or get as much airtime as the negative stories of the world, but we still have a voice.

And it’s up to us to use our voices to change the world.

#MoreOfUs

Your Turn

Do you believe that there are more positive people than negative people in this world? Jump into the comments below and make your voice heard!

Shola

Shola

Founder of The Positivity Solution
Author, keynote speaker, and kindness extremist who is committed to changing the world by helping as many people as possible to live and work with more positivity.
Shola
Shola
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Comments

  1. Aparajitha says:

    Hi Shola! You sort of read my mind. I was alone in a new city yesterday and couldn’t speak the local language fluently. The people I met were ridiculously helpful. One guy went as far as taking me to the bus station and refused to let me pay for the journey. My loved ones were pretty suspicious when I told them the story. But I think it’s enough to reinforce my belief that there are plenty of good people in the world.

  2. I have been saying this for a long time! It seems that people thrive on misery and tragedy.. guess it is what ‘sales’ the most? I would much rather see happy news than just dark, dismal stuff! I know we need to know what is going on in the world.. but I do feel bombarded by all the media stuff. Stories being projected and then a bottom & side scroll messages with more tragic stuff. Sickens me. So, I don’t really watch the news any longer and read via web. I also notice on Facebook, of all places, that when I post something happy.. majority 80-85% of the time.. crickets. I tend to be a very positive/optimistic person. When I post something negative or bad going on, FLOCKS of posted responses.. what is up with that? I just go about spreading love and sunshine.. hoping it will inspire someone with a more positive outlook for their own life!

  3. Harriet Hilecher says:

    Positivity, YES. Pay it forward!

  4. I absolutely loved reading this post. I really, really needed something like this to kick start my week as I have been leaning towards pessimism – it just kind of crept up on me with the stress from my classes and personal life. (Sorry!…I really did try.)

    Even though you probably didn’t know it would have such a tremendous impact on me. (: It did and I am, yet again, sincerely grateful for it. Thank you, Shola. You’ve just made my life that much greater.

    • No worries Takara–please believe that I have those days too! Also, thank you so much for the very kind words, it is an honor to know that my work is having a positive impact. That’s what keeps me writing! 🙂

  5. Yes, yes, yes! Thank you as always for the timely reminder.

  6. Hi Shola, thanks for talking about this. Those of us who are committed to positivity will encounter the doubters. As a person who over time has changed her default setting from “negative” to “positive”, I have read many articles and books about this topic. There is a huge body of research showing how our brains will latch onto, and remember, one minor negative incident, even in the midst of a hundred fantastic positives. This has to do with the way our primitive, pre-technology brains were hard-wired, so we would learn from a minor incident, and never again tangle with, say, a saber-tooth tiger. So, it is normal for the negatives to get our attention, and for us to give them an extraordinary amount of our energy. When we are aware of this, we can remember to consciously redirect our attention to positives, and over time, our brains will be retrained. Anyone who is interested would easily find supporting data around the web. And one last thing, as to the woman who called you “naive”: no matter how much she disagrees with you or anyone else, calling someone “naive” is a euphemism for calling them “stupid”. A veiled insult is still an insult, and not appropriate under any circumstances. Just the fact that she would approach you and hurl a random insult at you, indicates to me she herself is not very nice, or doesn’t feel very good about herself, and is in such a dark place she can’t imagine any reality other than her own. Well, don’t give up on her or those like her. I once would have thought and (unfortunately) acted much as she did to you, and yet I did manage eventually to learn and grow. Yes, we are the majority, and if we stick to positivity, we will have an impact. It pains me to say this, but I was a hard case, and if love and positivity finally got through to me, they can get through to just about anybody.

    • You know Donna, you’re right–I never thought of it that way before, but naive is definitely a euphemism for “stupid” (does that make me naive for not knowing that?) Truthfully, I could tell that she was in a very dark place, so I didn’t take it personally at all. Coincidentally, part of the reason why I was able to brush it off so quickly is because I’ve worked my ass off to re-wire my thinking to positive, instead of habitually falling back into my “lizard brain” default way of thinking.

      More importantly, I love your honesty and realness, and the fact that you were able to push through many life challenges to become a positive person will hopefully serve as an inspiration to others who are struggling to do the same 🙂

  7. Amen Shola! I don’t watch very much news. My favorite news spot on the internet is The Good News Network. That’s not to say I am not aware of what’s going on in the world, but I’m a bit of an empath and I seriously cannot handle all the horrible news out there. If I watch too much, I start to feel too much and become affected in ways I can’t handle on an emotional level. You’re so right about there being more of us. I really believe that most people are good and kind. This reminds me of something that my cousin posted a few days ago. We live in the snow belt, and she said there was a man who got his car stuck in the snow in the alley behind her house. She wanted to help him, but he was swearing and yelling a lot and she was a little scared. But, she worked up her nerve and went out and told him that if he quit swearing and yelling she would help him push his car out. He had a passenger who got out and helped and they got the car “unstuck”. The man and his passenger were extremely grateful and my cousin felt really good about the fact that she put her fear aside and decided to help. Three people had a positive experience that day…most people are good…Have a great week Shola!!

    • Spring, I love the Good News Network too! And like you, I’m also super empathetic, and dealing with the suffering and pain of others is too much for me to handle on a daily basis. I love the snow story and it goes to show that most people are good people who are willing to help–some will even fight through their own fear and discomfort to help others. Thanks for sharing, Spring!

  8. Hi Shola,

    Working in retail (on the front lines) I see not so nice behavior all the time, a great deal of it comes from my co-workers. What really makes my day is when I can turn a grumpy customer around (much more than the actual sale). An example; when a customer was purchasing a watch and the signage for a discount did not apply to her purchase (it was a bit misleading). I told her I would honor the discount and she reached across the counter and gave me a kiss on the cheek, told me I reminded her of her mother and how much her mother liked shopping at the store when she was a kid. All I did was make a small gesture but, it triggered a fond memory of her mother and it made my heart swell. All people really want is to know they are being treated fairly and honestly. What I thought was a small convenience turned out to be much bigger, I had made an impact on a complete strangers’ experience so much so that she was compelled to kiss and hug me, it was incredible. For me, knowing that being kind can affect another person is much more important than making a sale. That is probably why I’m the worst sales person in the department :)!

    Lots of love to you, Shola
    Kat

    • What an awesome story, Kat! As a former retail employee myself, I can definitely relate to the insane amount of rudeness that I would see from customers and staff members alike. It was easy to start losing faith in humanity in a hurry if I wasn’t careful. But the truth is that there is a lot of goodness in the world, as evidenced by the kiss on the cheek that you received. Sure, there may be other people in your department who are making more sales than you, but I doubt that there’s anyone in your entire store who is making as much of a positive difference in their customers’ lives as you are. Keep it up Kat–this is how we’ll change the world!

  9. PS Fan Girl says:

    Thank you for this message, Shola–a very timely reminder for me. We are absolutely who and what we surround ourselves with. When I read this I immediately thought of your “Who is in your VIP section” post. SO important to be around positive people making the world a better place. When I shift my focus and shift who I surround myself with, the world can get a lot brighter–that difference is amazing. Continuing to work on this!!

    • Hey PS Fan Girl (I love your name, by the way)! Yes, it’s not always easy, but we need to consistently surround ourselves with as much positivity as possible, which sounds great, but we both know how hard that can be. Like you said though, it becomes easier when we shift our focus to see that we are actually surrounded by more positivity than we might have previously noticed. Keep working on it, and I can promise you that I’ll be doing the same!

  10. Thank you I stopped seeing the good in people. I have and am still going through a lot of crap due to people I trusted. You are my only outlet.

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