It’s Time to Decide

Handsome young man on a lake's shore in a sunny, peaceful day, standing. Black and white shot

Your life is in front of you. What are you planning to do with yours?

Do you want to know the secret to living the most positive life possible?

Lean closer, because I don’t want too many people to be disappointed when they hear this.

Ready? Here it is:

There is no secret.

Sorry, but it’s true. You already know exactly what you need to do to make your life more positive than it already is right now, and it’s far from a secret.

It could be quitting your miserable job, starting a new business, walking away from a terrible relationship, losing excess weight, digging yourself out of debt, or creating more quality time with your family.

Whatever it may be, I’m confident that you know what you could do immediately to make your life more positive than it is right now.

The real question that needs to be answered is: Why aren’t you doing it?

That’s what I want to talk about.

Decide to Do It

“I do.”

“I quit.”

“Never again.”

“I’m ready.”

Do you know what those words represent?

A decision.

The word “decide” comes from the Latin word “decidere” which literally means “to cut off.”

When you decide to do something, you have effectively “cut off” any other options. You’ve drawn a line in the sand and committed to putting all of your effort into making your decision successful.

If there was a secret to living the most positive life possible, it would come down to this: Decide to do it.

That’s it. Don’t let anyone (including yourself) tell you otherwise.

Want to make more money and stop living paycheck to paycheck? Decide to do it.

Want to get into the best shape of your life and stop avoiding every mirror in your home? Decide to do it.

Want to experience more inner peace? Decide to do it.

Want to be in a loving relationship instead of settling for the soul-destroying relationship that you’re currently in? Decide to do it.

Don’t think it’s that simple?

Keep reading.

The Barrier to Making a Decision

If you haven’t decided to fully claim your life and make it awesome as you possibly can before you die, I think I know why.

You’re scared.

I can only say that because I’ve been there too (and in some areas of my life, I’m still there.)

If so, I want you to never forget this: Fear is nothing more than the anticipation of pain. 

For example:

Many people believe that it will be painful to consistently make healthy food choices, so instead they choose to jeopardize their health by ordering the #5 Value Meal at the local fast food joint every night.

Many people believe that it will be painful to give up their free time to work on their novel, so instead they choose to spend that free time watching hours and hours of reality TV.

Many people believe that it will be painful to explain to their kids why they’re leaving their emotionally-abusive spouse, so instead they suck it up and accept a lifelong, soul-decaying relationship for their kids’ sake.

Yes, the thought of possible future pain has stopped more people from making necessary life-enhancing decisions than anything else on this earth.

But do you know what should be more painful?

Accepting a less-than-ideal existence because you’re too scared to deal with a little pain in order to make it better.

Believe this–you can have whatever you want once you decide it’s important enough.

Making a decision isn’t about “talking a big game” about your goals and doing nothing. It’s also not about wasting your breath trying to convince everyone about how legit your excuses are.

A decision is about saying, “I’ve drawn my line in the sand, and I will do this. No. Matter. What.”

So, let me ask you this:

Based on that definition, do you remember when you made a real decision? A decision where you were willing to move heaven and earth to make something happen?

As one of my good friends once told me, “I can tell quality of someone’s life based on how he (or she) answers those two questions.”

I agree with that.

Once You Decide

Everything changes once you decide.

Excuses melt away, fears get stared down, and pain becomes a minor speed bump on the road to your personal greatness.

It all starts with your decision.

If you’re a person who is just kinda, sorta flirting with the idea that a better life would be cool, feel free to stop reading this blog post because this message isn’t for you.

For everyone else, let me ask you this:

Do you want something? I mean, really want something? Then decide that you will get it.

Cut off other options, burn the damn bridge and your boat, stop talking about what you’re going to do, and most of all, get to work.

I understand that leaving a toxic relationship is hard. Losing a large amount of weight is hard. Starting your own business is hard. Writing a book is hard. Committing to live a life of positivity is hard.

Here’s the good news: The universe rewards commitment, and there can be no commitment without a decision.

In the end, it all comes down to this:

Will you be remembered as one of the many who let their fear of pain stop them from truly living? Or will you make a stand today to be one of the few who will experience something greater, even if it’s hard to do it?

It’s time to decide.

Your Turn

Have you ever made a decision where you committed to do anything within your power to make your goal happen? Are you the type who struggles to stay committed to your decisions? Either way, jump into the comments below and make your voice heard!

Shola

Shola

Founder of The Positivity Solution
Author, keynote speaker, and kindness extremist who is committed to changing the world by helping as many people as possible to live and work with more positivity.
Shola
Shola
Shola

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Comments

  1. My birthday was this weekend & I vowed to myself that I would take better care of ME, start being true to myself instead of pleasing everyone else & to begin to see ME as God sees me. I’ve decided & I’m doing it! Thanks Shola for driving it home for me today….you’re right it’s that simple. Consistency will be the challenge.

    • So true, Lisa! Consistency will always be the challenge in sticking with any major life decision. Stay true to yourself and honor your inner greatness, and there is no doubt in my mind that you will be fine. You got this!

  2. Hey Shola,
    Another great post:) I find it uncanny how your blog posts usually correlate to what I am going through personally. For example, I have been meaning to make my own website and blog for nearly 3 years now, but I was scared to do it. I kept being negative and telling myself that I couldn’t do it (no one in my family/circle has a blog/website/business)…that is until this weekend, when I finally bought the two domains I wanted. I am excited that things from my vision board are coming to life!

    One problem I am facing, however, is choosing a web host! I do NOT know which one of them to pick, as they are all generally claiming “unlimited” stuff, or are kinda shady with return policy-not accepting paypal- or are lacking in other crucial aspects like security and runtime (99.5 vs. 99.9 vs 99.99% etc.). I’ve been going kind of crazy, but am still not giving up hope! Upon reading various comments on websites urging ppl to stay away from BlueHost, GoDaddy, HostGator, SiteGround, I am very confused…

    You are a really great guy, and I do not want to take advantage of your kindness, but do you recommend any web host for a beginner with high hopes? I sincerely feel the need to spread the knowledge I have, and since I’ve been blessed with having the opportunity to help people, I think creating a website would enable me to make a difference in the world. You, my man, are a perfect example:) With the amazing support I have received, I have decided that I NEED to Blog!

    I pray that you continue to smile throughout your life, and thank you for talking to me at UCM at the Leadership Conference. Take care Shola!
    -Abraham

    • Congrats Abraham for taking the first step to leaving the large group of people who only “talk” about their dreams, and becoming one of the few who actually do something about those dreams! Here is my incredibly simple (but life-changing) piece of advice for you on your journey: just get started. Every hosting company that you mentioned above is reputable and effective. Just like you, I spent three years dreaming about blogging before I took the leap, bought a domain, got hosting, and got started. During those three years, I was paralyzed by all of the conflicting information I would find online. “Start a blog/Don’t start a blog,” or “This webhost is awesome/No, that webhost sucks,” etc. The best advice that I received during that time was to just get started and self-correct along the way. Seriously my man, just take the leap, choose a host (trust me, every hosting company has lovers and haters–you’re not going to find one that is universally loved), and get going. You will be SO happy that you did.

  3. Hi Shola, Happy Monday and thanks for this post. This was something that was so hard for me, and I definitely have to keep myself aware of when I need to make a decision, and not just sit things out. It helps when I remind myself that choosing not to decide is actually a decision. By default, it means I choose to continue being miserable. When I think of it that way, that even if I don’t get my act together to make a decision, I’ve still made a decision, then it makes more sense to be proactive and decide something different. It’s part of taking responsibility for myself, and not feeling victimized by life. These are big steps to take if you haven’t thought this way before. I can only say that life improves so drastically, it gets easier and easier. Even when a decision doesn’t necessarily work out, I feel so empowered for taking that step, I feel encouraged to jump in and try again. The world we live in is so difficult and complicated, yet it is totally attainable for each of us to achieve peace and satisfaction in our lives. Thank you for the encouragement and for pointing the way.

    • As always Donna, well said! Choosing not to decide is a decision in itself, that’s why it is so important for us to consciously make decisions that will help to move us forward. Like you said, so much empowerment can come from owning our decisions–even if they don’t work out, at least we proactively used our power to choose. That is the key to living a positive life as far as I’m concerned 🙂

  4. Thank you Shola.
    Thanks for the direction. Thanks for the encouragement. Thanks for the truth. If I can’t change ever impedance, I’ll decide to do the work on what will make the most positive change. I will be who I was meant to be.
    Ed

  5. Oh my God Shola you are killing me! You are confronting me… And you are totally right.
    This is the best post so far, thanks, I really needed it.

  6. Hey Shola,
    I happened upon your blog today- thank you oracle Google (I kid) – and I am absolutely grateful for this. I must start by saying thank you for sharing your wisdom, your blog feels like home. Thank you for reminding me that living a life of positivity is a choice. However that it is also hard. I’ve had a pretty hectic year and somewhere along the way forgot this truth- resulting in unnecessary agony (naturally).
    I’m guilty of letting fear- of the unknown, of failure, of pain (both physical and emotional), of judgement- keep me from making some much needed changes in my life. It’s about that time to ‘decide to do it’- no options, no excuses.
    Thank you again.

  7. grainne says:

    Loving your blog posts. i’m going through big, positive changes in my life at the moment. These things are what I need to hear. Thanks.

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