GUEST POST: How To Deal With The Loss Of Your Best Friend

loss

Some friendships don’t last forever (Image Source: Pixabay)

Shola’s Note: Hey Solutionists! In my effort to introduce you to some amazing people who are working hard to make this world a more positive place, I have a treat for you! On this month’s Solutionist Spotlight, I have the honor of presenting professional self-development and personal growth writer, Mike Jones. Without further ado, here’s Mike!

I think we don’t talk often enough about what it is like to lose your best friend.

Not in some catastrophic, dramatic way, but just slowly drifting apart, until one day, you realize they are completely gone, even though they’re standing right next to you.

In pop culture, losing a loved one almost invariably means losing the person you are romantically involved with. Best friends always patch things up in the movies, even if their relationship goes south at some during the story. But in real life, that doesn’t always happen.

And I can tell you for a fact, dealing with this sort of loss is hard. [Read more…]

GUEST POST: The Key to Staying Locked in on Your Priorities

Young woman meditating indoors.A series of yoga poses. Closeup of woman's hands meditating indoors

It’s time to get serious about your priorities.

Shola’s Note: Hey Solutionists! In my effort to introduce you to some amazing people who are working hard to make this world a more positive place, I have a treat for you! On this month’s Solutionist Spotlight, I have the honor of presenting creative writer, marketing specialist, and positivity enthusiast, Mary Kleim. So, without further ado, here’s Mary!

Lack of direction, not lack of time, is the problem. We all have twenty-four hour days.” – Zig Ziglar

There’s a lot of wisdom when you scratch the surface of that quote. Why aren’t you doing the things you know you’re supposed to be doing? What prevents you from meditating at least half an hour a day? Why aren’t you finishing the online course you started? Why aren’t you reading more books?

Always the same answer – “There’s not enough time.”

But, there is! Nicola Tesla and Albert Einstein had the same 24 hours a day you have.

The yogis you admire on Instagram? Same thing. They seem to have their lives perfect. They have time for exercise, work, family, healthy cooking, and even social media.

How do they do it? The answer is: focus. They have found their center and know how to focus on the things that are important.

Being aware of the priorities has to be one of the most important traits of mental toughness. How do you achieve that quality? Let’s see. [Read more…]

GUEST POST: Finding Your Voice

Vintage microphone on table on light blue background

Are you ready to find your voice? Your best life may depend on it.

Shola’s Note: Hey Solutionists! In my effort to introduce you to some amazing people who are working hard to make this world a more positive place, I have a treat for you! On this month’s Solutionist Spotlight, I have the honor of presenting career strategist, positivity enthusiast and corporate trainer extraordinaire, Sherry Dodge. Besides being an excellent writer, speaker and overall human being, she is also one of the most positive people I have ever known in my 40 years on this earth. So, without further ado, here’s Sherry!

If you’re anything like me, there have been times in your life when you have had trouble speaking up.

Maybe it was telling your boss that you’re not able to work late, or telling your friend how you really feel about the new person they’re dating, or committing to that social event that you really don’t want to go to but feel obligated to go to anyway.

Or maybe it was something really simple, like not speaking up about where you want to go for dinner.

So often, we make the choice not to speak up. And we do it because we are thinking about all of the potential consequences that might occur if we do speak up.

  • What if she gets mad when I share my true opinion and it challenges her opinion?
  • What if there will be a really uncomfortable awkward silence after I tell him how I really feel?
  • What if I come across sounding stupid, or worse, incompetent?
  • What if I get rejected?
  • What if there is a long-lasting consequence to what I say that means my life is going to be changed…forever?

We can come up with “what-ifs” for days.

Unfortunately, “what-ifs” typically prevent us from taking action. They cause us to focus on the worst-case scenario–and that builds fear which can be paralyzing.

The truth is, we are not great at predicting the future. As hard as we try to predict every possible reaction or outcome, we often aren’t very accurate anyway.

Now, I am the first person to say that I tend to over-analyze everything.

I’m not saying that you shouldn’t give careful thought and consideration to how you live and what you say, and to consider potential consequences, but, at a certain point, the “what-ifs” start to take over, and they serve as excuses for not facing our fears. They become excuses for keeping things status quo.

That is a dangerous place to be because it makes us feel stuck. Our own thoughts prevent us from taking action. [Read more…]

GUEST POST: Tough Love

Couple Silhouette Breaking Up A Relation

Setting clear boundaries may be tough, but it’s necessary.

Shola’s Note: Hey Solutionists! In my effort to introduce you to some amazing people who are working hard to make this world a more positive place, I have a treat for you! On this month’s Solutionist Spotlight, I have the honor of presenting the founder of the blog Nursing My Appetite. and my dear friend, Whitney Hoover. Besides being one of the nicest people in the universe, she’s also smarter than the average bear when it comes to understanding this journey we call life (as you will soon read.) So, without further ado, here’s Whitney!

If there was a people-pleaser club, I’d be a shoe-in for President of the local chapter.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve fostered a natural desire and instinct to do anything that I can to bring joy, ease, relief and comfort to those around me. It’s a quality that I’m proud of and deeply value, but it’s also one half of a double-edged sword.

Being a people-pleaser means that I’m also not all that great at setting boundaries or saying no–usually out of the (admittedly ridiculous) fear of disappointing friends and strangers alike. I routinely ignore both gut and reason, freely and eagerly offering precious time, money, energy and ultimately mental health for the sake of accommodating others.

Thankfully, now I know the life-saving power of setting boundaries. [Read more…]

GUEST POST: 48 Acts of Kindness That You Should (And Can) Turn Into Habits

Love

Can kindness be turned into a habit? Absolutely.

Shola’s Note: Hey Solutionists! In my effort to introduce you to some amazing people who are working hard to make this world a more positive place, I have a treat for you! On this month’s Solutionist Spotlight, I have the honor of presenting Alex Karpman. Alex, his wife Olga, and their 6 year-old daughter Eva are running a Kickstarter campaign for SuperKind, a personalized product where your child is transformed into a SuperKind hero saving the world with acts of kindness. How cool is that? For more details about their Kickstarter campaign and the Karpman family, check out the bottom of this blog post–but without further ado, here’s Alex!

This Friday, November 13th is World Kindness Day! It’s a day that celebrates the undeniable power of kindness to transform our world for the better.

Since you’ll be hearing a lot about this wonderful holiday in the press and social media over the coming week, we figured this would be the perfect time to look within ourselves and find ways to incorporate kindness into our lives on a more regular basis. Indeed, the vast majority of the actions listed below will only take seconds, or minutes at the most, to complete. Yet, if you can make a habit out of doing them, you will see a profoundly positive impact on your life.

Ready to flex your kindness muscles? Let’s jump in! [Read more…]

GUEST POST: 8 Lies You Tell Yourself That Keep You From Being Happy

Depressed young man sitting on the floor and covering his face w

It’s time to get real.

Shola’s Note: Hey Solutionists! In my effort to introduce you to some amazing people who are working hard to make this world a more positive place, I have another treat for you! On this month’s Solutionist Spotlight, I have the honor of introducing you to Steve Roy. He’s a straight-shooter, the founder of Ending the Grind, and a guy with the power to help you break out of your routine (personally or professionally) and live with passion. So, without further ado, here’s Steve!

The next time you’re out in public, take a look around. Notice the look of indifference on people’s faces as they shuffle their feet, put their heads down, and pretend not to see you. Sadly, most people will walk through life with a sense of hopelessness and incompleteness.

It’s because most of us are living by society’s standards and not our own. We do all the things that are expected of us without much thought as to whether it’s actually right for us or will make us happy.

After all, life should be a happy experience, shouldn’t it?

You don’t have to live this way, but you may be choosing to. And a big part of the problem is that you are telling yourself the following lies that you have come to believe as truth. [Read more…]