• Stop Complaining

    If you’re anything like me, there are probably certain traits that you see in other people that drive you crazy. For example, here are a few less-than-pleasant traits that most well-adjusted people can’t stand: rudeness,… [Continue Reading]

    Stop Complaining
  • 3 Ways to Stay Positive in a Less Than Positive World

    “It’s completely unrealistic to be positive all of the time.” In a little over a year since The Positivity Solution has been in existence, I’ve probably heard at least 100 different people say the above… [Continue Reading]

    3 Ways to Stay Positive in a Less Than Positive World
  • Silencing the Haters

    “I could never do what you do.” We were sitting in a coffee shop next door to my office when my friend said those words to me. My friend is brilliant, funny, and an exceptional… [Continue Reading]

    Silencing the Haters
  • Bullied No More: The End of Workplace Bullying

    I know, I know…”hate” isn’t the most positive word in the world, and it’s not one that I throw around loosely, but I can’t think of a word that describes my feelings for bullies more accurately… [Continue Reading]

    Bullied No More: The End of Workplace Bullying
  • Living for Someday

    Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies in us while we live.” -Norman Cousins Do you know the exact moment when you’re going to die? Don’t worry, you’re not alone–none… [Continue Reading]

    Living for Someday

What Judging Others Reveals About You

outcast girl

Do you know what judging others reveals about you? A lot.

Judgment can really be an ugly thing.

A few months ago, I was line at the gym waiting to swipe my membership card to enter the gym for my morning workout when I heard something disturbing.

Two women who were ahead of me in line started chuckling to themselves and commenting about a woman inside of the gym.

Lady #1: “I wonder if fat-ass Shamu is here this morning.” (Side note: In case you didn’t know, “Shamu” is the name of the huge killer whale at Sea World.)

Lady #2 (pointing at an overweight woman on an elliptical machine wearing a black-and-white outfit): “Yep, there she is! God, she is such a pig!”

Then they both swiped their membership cards and chuckled their way inside of the gym.

Yes, these were grown women in their 30′s, who got their jollies by making fun of a woman who was working hard to positively deal with the issue that they were currently laughing at her for (if that makes any sense.)

Yes, judgment really is such an ugly thing.

Unfortunately for those two women, what they didn’t realize is that their comments about that woman told me (and the world) so much more about them than it did about that woman. [Read more...]

 

The Response

In The Spring Anchor

Are you anchored in? I hope so.

I really didn’t want to share with you what you’re about to read.

Keep reading, and you’ll see why.

Even though all of my personal friends already know this story, I think that 90% of the people reading this probably don’t.

As they say, some stories just need to be told. And even though it might not seem like it at first, this story you’re about to read has a positive ending–I promise.

It’s actually in the ending where the real story begins. [Read more...]

 

Go Where You’re Wanted

If you’re not wanted, why stay?

Don’t chase people. Be yourself, do your own thing and work hard. The right people–the ones who really belong in your life–will come to you. And stay.” -Will Smith

I believe deeply in simplicity.

One of my biggest blogging goals is to take complex concepts about living a more positive life, and streamline them in hopes of making it easier for thousands (maybe millions, one day?) of people to finally put them into action.

Here are five of my favorite examples:

1) What you allow is what will continue.

2) Stop complaining.

3) Leave the world better than you found it.

4) You have nothing to prove to anyone.

5) Be your own hero.

Simple, right?

And now, it’s time for another positivity solution (see what I did there?) that can save you from a ton of unnecessary pain and misery if you choose to follow it consistently:

Only go where you are wanted. [Read more...]

 

3 Myths About Being Strong That You Need to Stop Believing Today

The moment when we’re feeling the weakest, is the moment when we can find our strength.

It’s scary, isn’t it?

If you’ve ever been there before, you know exactly what I’m talking about too.

The feeling of complete mental and emotional burnout.

Most of you already know this, but I took the past three weeks off from everything.

No Monday morning blog posts. No inspirational status updates on my Facebook page or Twitter feed. No computers, no emails, and no writing. Nothing.

Just me taking a much-needed vacation in Hawaii (Kauai, to be specific) with my family to clear my head and recover from the worst burnout that I have ever experienced in my life to date.

Here’s a little context about where this burnout came from: Right now, I’m working 50+ hours a week as a Director at a Top-5 U.S. Hospital, I’m maintaining The Positivity Solution blog each week (and its social media pages every day), I’m working hard to be the best husband and father that I can possibly be (which are my most important jobs, by far), I’m writing a book, and with whatever time is left, I’m trying to squeeze in time to sleep and have a social life.

And unsurprisingly, I epically failed to keep juggling all of those balls in the air. My health, the quality of my work, and yes, my positivity all suffered mightily because of it.

On Monday July 21st, at the lowest point of my burnout, I hit the “Publish” button on my last blog post (which I can now admit that I wrote in an attempt to kick my own ass into gear), and I stared lifelessly at my computer screen with absolutely nothing left in the tank and nothing left to give.

So, I walked away. [Read more...]

 

Your Most Powerful Asset

Happy child enjoying on grass field and dreaming

This kid knows what the world’s most powerful asset is, do you?

“There are two types of people in this world: The ones who make you feel better as soon as they walk into a room, and the ones who make you feel better as soon as they walk out of it.”

That brilliant quote is courtesy of my mom, in case you were wondering.

I was probably 10 years old when she said it to me, and immediately after hearing it there was only one thought that stuck in my brain:

Whatever it takes, I will never be one of the people in the second group.

I wish that I could tell you otherwise, but I have failed many times in keeping that promise to myself.

As I’ve said before on this blog, I used to be a chronic complainer. I blamed everyone for my problems. I had an excuse for every reason why my life was failing. I would hate on anyone who was happier and more successful than I was.

In other words, I was “that guy” who literally made every room that I walked into a worse place than it was before my arrival.

Things have changed a lot since those days, and it’s mainly because I have finally realized what the world’s most important asset is, and how to use it in my favor.

If you don’t know what it is, allow me to introduce it to you. [Read more...]

 

GUEST POST: 8 Lies You Tell Yourself That Keep You From Being Happy

Depressed young man sitting on the floor and covering his face w

It’s time to get real.

Shola’s Note: Hey Solutionists! In my effort to introduce you to some amazing people who are working hard to make this world a more positive place, I have another treat for you! On this month’s Solutionist Spotlight, I have the honor of introducing you to Steve Roy. He’s a straight-shooter, the founder of Ending the Grind, and a guy with the power to help you break out of your routine (personally or professionally) and live with passion. So, without further ado, here’s Steve!

The next time you’re out in public, take a look around. Notice the look of indifference on people’s faces as they shuffle their feet, put their heads down, and pretend not to see you. Sadly, most people will walk through life with a sense of hopelessness and incompleteness.

It’s because most of us are living by society’s standards and not our own. We do all the things that are expected of us without much thought as to whether it’s actually right for us or will make us happy.

After all, life should be a happy experience, shouldn’t it?

You don’t have to live this way, but you may be choosing to. And a big part of the problem is that you are telling yourself the following lies that you have come to believe as truth. [Read more...]