• Silencing the Haters

    “I could never do what you do.” We were sitting in a coffee shop next door to my office when my friend said those words to me. My friend is brilliant, funny, and an exceptional… [Continue Reading]

    Silencing the Haters
  • Living for Someday

    Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies in us while we live.” -Norman Cousins Do you know the exact moment when you’re going to die? Don’t worry, you’re not alone–none… [Continue Reading]

    Living for Someday
  • 3 Ways to Stay Positive in a Less Than Positive World

    “It’s completely unrealistic to be positive all of the time.” In a little over a year since The Positivity Solution has been in existence, I’ve probably heard at least 100 different people say the above… [Continue Reading]

    3 Ways to Stay Positive in a Less Than Positive World
  • Bullied No More: The End of Workplace Bullying

    Shola’s Note (10/13/2014): “In honor of National Bullying Prevention Month, I’m re-posting this blog post in hopes of drawing more attention to the devastating effects of workplace bullying. If you don’t think this issue is… [Continue Reading]

    Bullied No More: The End of Workplace Bullying
  • Stop Complaining

    If you’re anything like me, there are probably certain traits that you see in other people that drive you crazy. For example, here are a few less-than-pleasant traits that most well-adjusted people can’t stand: rudeness,… [Continue Reading]

    Stop Complaining

The 5 Unshakable Traits of Mental Toughness

Mental Toughness

How mentally tough are you?

You either control your mind or it controls you.

It’s no exaggeration to say that the previous sentence holds the secret to life. As far as I’m concerned, the biggest and most important battle that we’ll ever fight on this earth is the battle between our two ears.

Consistently control your mind and you’ll win. Allow undisciplined thoughts to control your behaviors and actions, and you’ll lose. Repeatedly.

Simple, right? So, why do so many people come up on the losing end so often?

It all comes down to one critical factor: Mental Toughness.

I think of mental toughness as the next step past developing resilience.

The guy who stays cool under pressure? He has it. The woman who can stay locked-in on a goal despite the drama that’s going on around her? She has it too.

This is a critical skill to develop because every (and I mean, every) wildly successful person who I have had the pleasure of interacting with personally or professionally has a healthy amount of it.

Below are the five most common traits that I’ve personally noticed in those people. Do you have these five traits working for you in your life?

Let’s find out. [Read more...]

 

Bullied No More: The End of Workplace Bullying

Workplace bullying

This is NOT the guy who you want to spend 40 hours a week with.

Shola’s Note (10/13/2014): “In honor of National Bullying Prevention Month, I’m re-posting this blog post in hopes of drawing more attention to the devastating effects of workplace bullying. If you don’t think this issue is a big deal, just read the comments below for a serious wake-up call. Workplace bullying destroys lives, and it’s time for us to put a stop to it.”

I know, I know…”hate” isn’t the most positive word in the world, and it’s not one that I throw around loosely, but I can’t think of a word that describes my feelings for bullies more accurately than hate. “Extreme dislike” is too weak for me.

Keep reading and I’ll explain exactly why.

Bullying in any form is unquestionably terrible, but I want to focus on a form of bullying that doesn’t always get the attention that it deserves.

Specifically, I’m talking about workplace bullies.

Bullying in the workplace has reached near-epidemic status, and it’s time that we put an end to this behavior once and for all. This may sound ambitious, but my goal is that this post will mark the beginning of the end of bullying in the workplace.

I’m dead serious about making this happen. People have suffered for far too long at the hands of these sociopaths, and I’m calling for it to end now.

And just like anything, it all begins with you.

The future of the workplace as we know it depends on all of us taking control of our work lives and eradicating workplace bullies starting today.

In other words, it’s time for us to be the heroes in our own workplace story.

Fair warning, this isn’t going to be easy–but then again, this isn’t about doing what’s “easy.”

This is about doing what’s necessary.

There’s a lot to dive into, so let’s get to it. [Read more...]

 

Developing Resilience

How resilient are you?

Do you know the one trait that is absolutely essential to have in order to live a positive life?

Is it optimism? Gratitude? Friendliness? Generosity?

Maybe, but none of those qualities are what I want to talk about in this blog post.

In my opinion, this is the one trait that we all must have in order to live the most positive life possible:

Resilience. [Read more...]

 

Never Too Late

Do you think that it’s too late for you? Think again.

It is always too early to decide that it’s too late.” -Unknown

I remember reading the above quote on the Facebook page of one of my favorite blogs, and ever since then, I cannot stop thinking about it.

In life, it is far too common for people to believe deeply in the myth of “too late.” Maybe you’ve believed in it too. I know that I used to believe in it at one time.

Be honest with yourself, have you ever said or thought any of the following things?

It’s too late to completely change careers.

It’s too late to start a new diet and/or exercise program.

It’s too late to fix my credit.

It’s too late to get a college degree.

It’s too late to tell (insert person here) that I’m sorry.

It’s too late to write a book.

It’s too late to find true love.

It’s too late to move to a new city with warmer weather.

It’s too late to learn a foreign language.

It’s too late to start my own business and be my own boss.

It’s too late for me to be a better mother/father to my kids.

It’s too late to stand up to my coworker who is making my work life a living hell.

It’s too late to leave my significant other.

It’s too late to travel the world.

It’s too late to make any meaningful changes in my life.

It’s too late to have a bigger impact on the world.

It’s too late to be happy.

If so, stop it.

It is never too late for you. Yeah, I said it. Never.

In the words below, it’s my hope that you’ll see exactly why that is true. [Read more...]

 

You Can’t Run Forever

Sad boy alone in a bare room

What you’re running from will find you.

Do you know what I used to believe with every fiber of my being?

That I could run away from all of my problems.

It didn’t matter to me if it was an unhealthy romantic relationship, a bill collector’s phone calls, a nagging toothache, or a persistent sadness that I couldn’t seem to shake off, my solution was to avoid feeling it.

That’s because I believed that if I avoided my pain–or worse, if I ran in the opposite direction of my pain–it would eventually go away.

It didn’t. 

Yours won’t either.

If you’re running away from your demons right now, I can promise you that they will be waiting for you when you finally decide to stop running.

Even worse, at that point you’ll probably be too exhausted and too burned out to deal with those demons.

And it’s at that moment when they’ll win.

There’s a much better way, and just like everything else on this blog, it’s going to require some courage in order to make it happen.

Ready? [Read more...]

 

Decide.

Drawing A Line In The Sand.  An Old Metaphor.

Decide.

Do you want to know the secret to living the most positive life possible?

Lean closer, because I don’t want too many people to be disappointed when they hear this.

Ready? Here it is:

There is no secret.

Sorry, but it’s true. You already know exactly what you need to do to make your life more positive than it already is right now, and it’s far from a secret.

It could be quitting your miserable job, starting a new business, walking away from a terrible relationship, losing excess weight, digging yourself out of debt, or creating more quality time with your family.

Whatever it may be, I’m confident that you know what you could do immediately to make your life more positive than it is right now.

The real question that needs to be answered is: Why aren’t you doing it?

That’s what I want to talk about. [Read more...]